Christians & Sex: The Church’s Dirty Little Secret


I was a bit caught off guard this morning to find out that the Xian blogging world was going nuts over the sexy Super Bowl commercials and the Beyonce half-time show. For the most part I thought Super Bowl Sunday was ‘business as usual’ with no more or less skin than the average January football game day.

Xians however have been firing out blogs in disgust with the same gusto that the Nazi’s invaded Poland with, consider some of these titles; “Sex, Shame, and the Super Bowl” and “Slut-Shaming and the Attractiveness Factor”.

In yesterday’s post I talked about the apprehension Xians have in talking about sex in a positive way. Sure they are able to condemn sex (like in the Beyonce show) but try and get a group of Xians to have a positive conversation about the wonderful thing we call sexual intercourse and you will find yourself in an empty room.

Why do Christians seem hell bent on spending 99.9% of their sex talk time discussing what they view to be the evil aspects of sex and sexuality?

I suspect it is because in their private lives; Christians have been keeping a few dirty little secrets. Consider the following statistics compiled by various reputable sources;

37% of pastors say they view pornography regularly.
(Christianity Today, Leadership Survey, 12/2001)

20% of the calls received on the Pastoral Care Line are for help with issues such as pornography and compulsive sexual behavior

33% of clergy admitted to having visited a sexually explicit Web site. Of those who had visited a pornography site, 53% had visited such sites “a few times”in the past year, and 18% visit sexually explicit sites between a couple of times a month and more than once a week

29% of “born again” adults in the U.S. feel it is morally acceptable to view movies with explicit sexual behavior. (The Barna Group)

57% of pastors say that addiction to pornography is the most sexually damaging issue to their congregation. (Christians and Sex Leadership Journal Survey, March 2005)

Thus, with all of the evangelical posturing over the “evils” of sex and sexuality in the marketplace, in their private lives these same Christians are, dare I say, hypocritical?

Consider this story, “A number of years ago a national conference for church youth directors was held at a major hotel in a city in the mid-west. Youth pastors by the hundreds flooded into that hotel and took nearly every room. At the conclusion of the conference, the hotel manager told the conference administrator that the number of guests who tuned into the adult movie channel broke the previous record, far and away outdoing any other convention in the history of the hotel

The church has a dirty little secret when it comes to sexuality outside of the bounds of marriage and I suspect that until they church comes to terms with this subject they just won’t be taken very serious.

As I said yesterday, until Christians are able to talk about sex in a more honest and positive way, I suspect the church will continue to look and act irrelevant and out of touch with the lives of normal Americans.

[Photo from]

Categories: Religion

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5 replies

  1. First of all, the authors of those two posts are not Evangelical Christians but Catholics. Second, neither of those posts are slamming Beyonce. One specifically calls out people for saying she was disgusting. Maybe read the posts you link to first, instead of just linking to them cause you like the titles. Both those authors (I know because I am one) have written numerous posts about the wonderful aspects of sex. Here’s just a sample:

  2. “As I said yesterday, until Christians are able to talk about sex in a more honest and positive way, I suspect the church will continue to look and act irrelevant and out of touch with the lives of normal Americans.”

    That was exactly my goal in my first book. I am liking and sharing this post not only because people need to hear about this but also because I like anybody who uses the word “irrelevant”.


  1. Kirche heute, 8.Februar 2013 « Moment Mal
  2. Christians are more promiscuous than Muslims & Hindus | The Culture Monk
  3. Christians & Sex: The Church’s Dirty Little Secret | Crazy Thoughts of Chandler

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