by Kenneth Justice
~ In the past week two different friends both confided in me their desire to be in a serious relationship and ultimately married.
One friend feel’s that they are getting a bit older and that they have ‘waited long enough’
My other friend expressed the feeling of loneliness, “It’s really hard coming home to an empty house”
For those of us who have had serious relationships in the past or are currently in a serious relationship…..we know both the joys and sometimes the pitfalls of being in a relationship
Ultimately, for many of us the joys far outweigh the pitfalls
Although our sex saturated Western Culture tends to overemphasized the sexuality aspect of relationships……I have found conversation to be one of the most awesome elements of a relationship.
One of the things I love about being in a relationship is traveling. I enjoy traveling with my spouse, my children, and even my friends.
One of the coolest aspects of traveling with someone you love is expressing your delight to each other; it’s not enough to merely see a beautiful waterfall together in a distant land, we tend to say out loud to each other, “Wow, what a beautiful view” and then we talk about that view for many years to follow, “Remember that trip we took to Ireland and the day we visited the Cliffs of Moher?”
Perhaps this is why I have kept some very long-term friends in my life as well; I really enjoy meaningful conversation.
Rarely a week goes by that I don’t talk to my two closest friends once or twice throughout the week……I have been friends with them since I graduated high-school.
However, I fear that conversation in our culture is slowly becoming antiquated…..conversation is becoming a thing of the past.
–) As I said last week, I’ve noticed among young adults a great proclivity among them to hang-out together in silence as they sit and stare at their smart phones
–) But even among adults…..I see more and more men and women who spend far more time in front of the television or playing video games than they do enjoying meaningful conversation
Our lives our busy…..I get that…..I’ve even written about the busyness of our lives at nausea; but at a certain point don’t we need to step back and begin pursuing deeper and more meaningful conversations with each other? If we don’t……what will be said about our culture when future generations look back at us?
Perhaps this is why I’m drawn to blogging; it offers me an element of conversation that is a tad bit deeper than 140 character texts or Facebook updates about what I had for breakfast……
Yet even blogging has its limitations; as much as I enjoy this medium, it can never truly replicate the joy of sitting with a close friend, or even a new friend at a cafe while we enjoy each other’s presence.
When it comes to blogging we never look back and say, “Remember that time we were blogging together and we saw that beautiful waterfall?”
As much as I love blogging it does have its limitations….
We humans are ‘social creatures’; we thrive on being connected to each other via a social experience.
Yet not only are we social creatures; we are tactile creatures. We love it when our five sense are stimulated.
–) We enjoy being touched
–) We enjoy smelling beautiful aromas
–) We enjoy hearing sounds
–) We enjoy seeing beautiful things
–) We enjoy tasting beautiful foods
The Internet and television are able in a limited way to satiate two of our senses; sight and hearing……yet the other three senses are left unmet
This is why the Internet and television are limited in their ability to satisfy and fulfill us……and it explains why a good cup of coffee with a friend at a cafe seems to be filled with so much more meaning and depth than spending time on the Internet or watching television.
When all five; touch, hearing, smell, taste, and sight are stimulated at once the depth of the experience is heightened in our realm of senses and the impact on our memory and joy is so much greater…..
Perhaps one day I will meet many of my blogging friends outside of the Internet and we will enjoy a cup of coffee together and ruminate over the experience for years to come……
But as it is, I am thankful for even this limited connection with the many people I have met via the Internet and am thankful for the positive elements of the Internet…..
I only hope that many of us do not forget that the Internet and electronic media can never truly replace the joy of a face-to-face relationship…….
The Internet can never replace the joy of a good cup of coffee…which is what I’m about to enjoy right now.